This isn’t your day

Grimmjow really wanted a cup of sake.

This was the worst day, well, not of his life but in a long time.

First of all he got out of the bed on the wrong side. Hell, nearly every time he got up he was in a bad mood, but this time it was different. Worse than it was supposed to be.

Then he had to save D-Roy’s ass because that stupid worm stole Il Forte’s hairbrush - or some girly shit like that. The bullboy chased D-Roy through the halls of Las Noches yelling and cursing at him, while the other arrancar laughed and screamed in turn. Grimmjow would have found the sight ridiculous if he wasn’t forced to chase them around too, trying to catch Il Forte before he killed D-Roy. Not that he wouldn’t be happy if the annoying little shit dropt off the hooks finally, but he didn’t want to loose one of his subordinates in a stupid way like that. So he had to beat Il Forte up. And D-Roy too, just to be fair.

Then that idiot Gin started to pester him on the Espada meeting. And the little bitch was able to make him blush! In front of everyone! Not that he gave a shit anyway, but it was annoying. However, Neliel and Halibel thought it was cute. He fucking hated to be called cute…

„I really need that goddamn sake.”- he mumbled as he walked in an empty corridor.

„I happen to have some.”- or supposed to be empty…

He turned around and saw Szayel Aporro standing in front of a door - which wasn’t there two minutes ago, Grimmjow could swore- his hands behind his back and there was a smooth smile on his face. He was damn suspicious.

„The fuck do you want?

„How rude. – Szayel sighed dramatically – I just invited you for a cup of sake. What’s wrong with that?

„You don’t invite people unless you wanna poison them. – Grimmjow spat.

„I don’t intend to poison you. Honest.- Szayel made a face what was supposed to be a pout.

Grimmjow just glared.

„Oh, come on, you’re so uptight. I wanted to thank you that you gave back that hairbrush to my brother. If he couldn’t brush his hair properly every day, he’d be, how should I say, a pain in the ass. Not to mention he’d steal mine and I need my hairbrush.”

Oookay.

Too. Much. Information.

Mental note: make a man of the bullboy. At least persuade him of a good old haircut. Szayel was hopeless, with his pink hair and obsession over neat clothes, but thanks to Hougyaku, Il Forte became more manly. He was the most similar to Grimmjow among his five subordinates; as insane as him. And he didn’t want any guy who resembles him in any sort of way to be girly. But at least he hasn’t got pink hair, for fuck’s sake.

“Here, I didn’t put anything in it.” – said Szayel. His hair cast a shadow on his eyes, so Grimmjow couldn’t see the mischievous glint in them.

„I will kill you if you try something.”- the blue haired Espada said, but took the cup – where did Szayel pull that out from? - and gulped the sake down. His gut feeling told, no, downright screamed not to do but at the moment he didn’t give a flying fuck about it. He had, after all, a really bad day. And he needed booze. Now.

The sake was surprisingly good and there wasn’t any unusual taste or smell in it.

„Where did ya get this from?”- Grimmjow asked, motioning to the now empty cup.

„From Aizen-sama in exchange for my little experiment in tea flavours. – Szayel adjusted his glasses and cracked a very distressing smile.

Grimmjow was sure he’ll never ever drink tea on the Espada meetings anymore.

“Well, I think I’m done here, so goodbye Sexta-san.”- he turned around and slowly started to walk away.

“Wait, gimme more of that shit.”- Grimmjow yelled after him.

“I think you had enough. More from that sake could be quite harmful for you. - with that Szayel disappeared on the corner.

Harmful.

Grimmjow knew he was in deep shit. That man –man?- was insane. Not the kind of insane like Grimmjow or Il Forte, but that silent madman who made horrifying things in the dark of the night, while at daylight he was the kind and helpful neighbour. He knew it wasn’t wise to take that bitch’s offer, but he couldn’t do anything with it now.

He shrugged and headed back to his room. If something was gonna happen to him – he grows another head or something – he didn’t want to be seen.

-----

Grimmjow slowly opened his eyes. Hell, there was something in the sake if it knocked him out for, he guessed, at least half a day. He tried to reach for his jacket what he had dropt to a nearby chair after he had entered his room. Why did it seem so much bigger than he remembered it? And why the fuck did everything seem so much bigger?

Then Grimmjow happened to glance down at his hands. His eyes widened. Incoherent thoughts started to chase each other in his mind.

Where his hands used to be there were now paws. Little, blue, fluffy paws.

‘Shit. ShitshitshitshitshitshitshitshitshitshitshitshitSHITSHITSHIT’

“Oh, I see my little experimental was successful.” - came an amused voice from the door.

‘Szayel I-Will-Rip-Off-Your-Balls-If-You-Have-Any Aporro Grantz.’

“Now, I can see what Neliel-san meant by you being adorable. In this form you are cute, Kitten-san.”

‘Fuck off, bastard!’- Grimmjow tried to yell, but only an angry – and rather tiny- hiss came out.

“Oh, I forgot to mention you can’t speak in this form as well as cannot use cero, release or use your zanpakotou or do any harmful things to other people.” – he cracked a malicious smile.- “Now, we should hurry if we don’t want to be late from the meeting.”

Waitafuckinminute. This little shit was trying to tell him he has to show up in front of the others- in this state?! Not that he gave a shit about what the others thought anyway, just… whatever.

He hissed as Szayel grabbed his nape and lifted him up from the bed.

‘It fucking hurts, bastard!!’- As he hung from the scientist’s grab Grimmjow tried to scratch and bite but he couldn’t reach the pink haired man’s hand.

Well fuck, this really wasn’t his day.

------

Heavy silence filled the room. He could feel the tension in the air. Everybody stared at him. Well, except Tousen, who – happen to be blind – couldn’t stare.

“I thought I should bring Grimmjow-san to the meeting since he seemed like he wouldn’t come automatically. – Szayel said matter-of-factly.

‘Jerk.’- Grimmjow thought. Matter-of-factly.

“Szayel-han, do ya mean that this lil’ cute thinghy is our ol’ grumpy Grimmy-han?- Gin asked in a sing-song voice.

“Exactly. I wanted to make an experimental so I needed to find a guinea pi… um, I mean candidate.”

‘Candidate my ass.’- Grimmjow thought angrily and tried to sink his tiny claws into Szayel’s gloved thumb. Once again, he failed.

“He was a perfect subject, since he transforms into an animal like creature when he releases his zanpakotou. The purpose of my experimental was to find out more about this transformation, so we could create dangerous warriors or spies who are above suspicion.”

“So you chibified the panther in him to create a spy who’s above suspicion.”- said Aizen calmly. Szayel just nodded. – “I don’t know if it’s obvious or not that you just wasted one of my precious warriors.”- Aizen didn’t want to state that nearly all of the arrancars transform into animal like creatures and Szayel could pick up a lesser important person. Well, he might be a scientist but he wasn’t too good at basic things.- “Now, should I start creating a new Sexta Espada or this little problem will be solved? I don’t think he can kill with his cuteness, but our shinigami friends would surely die from laughter if I sent him into battle like this.”

“Don’t worry Aizen-sama, he will turn back into his original form... in some time.- Szayel stated hurriedly.- ‘He better do’- he added in mind.

“Whatta pity. He’z more tolerable like this.”- Gin said and stood next to Szayel.- “Can I hold ‘im?”

‘HELL NO!!’-Grimmjow screamed inside. He tried to squirm out of the scientist’s hands, but was handed to the ex-third division captain. Grimmjow felt himself pulled into a bone-shattering embrace and Gin started patting his head.- “Can I keep ‘im, Aizen-san? Pretty pleeeease!”

Aizen started to massage his temple. Being god was helluva hard work…

‘This is awkward.’- Grimmjow thought as he lied on the left arm of the white haired man, his other hand massaging the spot behind his cat ear.- ‘More like bizarre. Mortifying.’

Grimmjow dug all his teeth and claws into the ex-captain’s skin trying to cause enough pain so he would let him go. Gin didn’t seem to notice.

Quiet snicker was heard and was followed by many others. The Espadas were on the edge of their composure. Nnoitra couldn’t bear anymore and burst into a high-pitched, malicious sneer. Halibel and Neliel leaned against each other trying to muffle their quiet giggle.

“What’s the joke?”- asked Zomari, but was damped by Yami’s and Aaroniero’s deep and sharp roars. They bent down to the table, burying their faces into their arms, Yami pounding the surface of the table with one of his fists. Ulquiorra hide his face behind his hands. Nobody knew – or care, period- if he laughed or cried. Probably he laughed till he cried. Szayel just smiled evilly, proud of himself that he could make some memorable moments to his fellow Espadas. Stark simply slept along.

‘WHAT’S SO DAMN FUNNY, BITCHES?!’- Grimmjow wanted to bawl, but only managed to hiss. The dying laughter revived.

Gin quietly chuckled above his head and loosened his embrace to change his rather damaged arm under the pugnacious cat. Grimmjow broke free in an instant and jumped to the table. He seriously considered scratching some of his ‘fellow’s’ faces until they looked like a chequered bloody mess, but decided to run instead. Until he was pulled into a tight embrace. Between two huge… things.

“Haven’t I said he’s kawaaaiii?!”- came a cheerful voice. Neliel. Now Grimmjow had some ideas what those things were. Seriously, he liked the idea to be petted by Neliel, but he’d rather be in his arrancar form to pet her back.

Wish and you shall have your wish.

The next thing Grimmjow knew that he was choked by Neliel, his neck painfully arched backwards, his hands –searching for support- grabbing who knows which parts of the arrancar girl’s body, his legs in abnormal – and painful, fucking painful!- positions.

Laughter filled his head as he got out from Neliel’s grasp and headed, no, downright fly out of the meeting hall.

As he dawdled towards his room he devised slow and painful deaths to his fellow Espadas. Especially Szayel. And Gin. Grimmjow unconsciously scratched the skin behind his ear. It felt like he was still patted by the foxface and his skin tingled in discomfort just from the thought.

When he finally reached the door to his room, he tried to enter but was hold back by the massive, evil, locked door.

He forgot that bastard Szayel locked it behind them when he dragged Grimmjow to the meeting. Now, the Sexta Espada had to turn back and face that annoying little fruitcake and the others on the meeting just to grab his keys so he could hide from the world in his room - at least for a week.

This wasn’t his day at all.

As he ambled along the halls of Las Noches he felt ridiculous and humiliated.

Now, Grimmjow really wanted a cup of… milk.

‘Fuck...’

--

Ooookay, so that’s it. Well, I hope you like it:D

Um, this is my first fanfic ever, and also the first story I wrote in English. I’m sure there’re grammar mistakes as well as wrong choice of words. Man, my English sucks. X’D But I hope it wasn’t so bad.